atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
