you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
