Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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