if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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