no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
