I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
