Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
