How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Four minutes until I can fart!
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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