why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
