WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize