Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
