clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
