Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
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