first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
