Don't you send me to vm
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Randomize
