this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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