Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
