i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Randomize
