Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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