she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize