i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
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