we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Randomize
