I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
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