I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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