you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize