Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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