meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
