That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
