come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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