absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
