I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
