I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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