just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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