Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
