He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Help. Why am I so naked?
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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