I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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