I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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