Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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