just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
