I want to have your abortion
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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