I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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