me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
