At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
