she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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