I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
