Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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