It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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