and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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