She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Randomize
