you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Randomize
