I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Randomize